Time - by Jacopochi

Each day seems the same.  Time passes quickly and there is little distinction from one day to another.  I think especially with no activities or vacations or meetings or school or real appointments to mark time, each day feel like a repeat of yesterday.

The other day, I woke up and I didn't hear birds which was odd.  I didn't know what time it was.  We had birds in a nest until a couple weeks ago,  After the 5 eggs hatched, we heard the birds every morning and throughout the day as they cried out for food.  I'm not sure how, but they all grew in that nest and after what seemed like a very short time (but was probably several weeks), they each left the nest one by one.  Time passed for the birds and they moved on. 

The other thing happening is that for the very few things I am supposed to be doing, it is very hard to get anything done.  There are several items looming - they are personal items - but they loom large.  Yet, the day passes quickly and the next day begins and they loom again.  It may be the lack of distinct times when things need to happen. 

The house has gotten pretty messy.  Mail is in piles.  A puzzle has been started here.  Towels that need to be given away are sitting in a not towel place / not giveaway place.  Equipment from a hike a few weeks ago sits there.  Laundry has been washed, but waits in another place.  There's no cause to put it away.  We have no where to be, no one is coming over, we have no plans to return because we haven't left, there's nothing to get done before we go out because there is no before and there is no after.  The logic the kids used on me to try to get out of chores seems to make sense these days, "why clean that/make the bed/pick that up?  It's just going to get messy again."

 

All the things are just hanging - suspended in the air as time passes.  I thought maybe waiting for things to open back up, but that has not changed our behavior significantly.  We took a road trip and it was a strange escape because we were either outside or holed up in the hotel, but now we are back and it is like we did not leave.

There is just now.