Liberal Houseplant

With local residents returning to their regularly scheduled activities after more than a year in quarantine, a startling fact has been realized -- teens occupy the main bathroom for no less 95% of their waking hours when they are home and not eating. Essentially, this leaves a very small window for the remaining residents to use said bathroom uninterrupted. These time windows include: 2:45 - 5:50 am 10:00 - 11:28 am In making observations over the past few days after being unable to bath, brush my teeth, or use the toilet upstairs at times one would consider "getting ready" hours of 6:00 - 8:00 am or "preparing to sleep" hours of 9:30 - 11:30 pm, here is a sampling of known activities taking place in the bathroom. Texting Sighing Reading Toileting Plant care The make up Face washing Feminine care Sauna creation Contemplations Watching videos Doing of the hair Clothing one's self Watching mold grow Shedding winter coats Aerosol can overspray Full body sink bathin...

It's been so long since we've had anyone over, I've been really cleaning the house up for our guest.  I hope the plumber appreciates all this effort. 5/5/21 Update.   The plumber was the worst first houseguest during the pandemic. The plumber made me angry. I decided to let it go and not post a review because the general response women, yeah, women get from providing feedback or talking about what is going on is not good.  There are labels and names used to describe them: Karen, bitch, hypochondriac, crazy, emotional.  Add on being a minority, or as I'm more seeing these days "an other" to describe anyone different, and there is another layer of treatment variety that I'm struggling to articulate. Then I got emails every day asking for a review.  I sent feedback to the company instead. I got quoted off angie's list for slow drains. When I spoke with the person who called to schedule, I let them know it was multiple drains. The person who came cleared h...

Many had been looking to ending 2020 and blamed it for all the bad in the world, but the calendar flipped and bad stuff is still happening.  I think the last time anyone made an update here, there was maybe a thought that things were getting better.  COVID continues on as does our current President's tactics.  I have continued to work on my Portuguese but more recently have been thinking maybe this Mars thing is not a bad idea. Until whatever happens next, we just started getting home delivery of the newspaper again - what is a newspaper?  It's this thing that gets delivered to your porch and it is made out of paper.  For the past couple days, we've been collectively working on the crossword puzzles in it.  Scott and I have almost finished the Sunday Times crossword puzzle which would feel like an amazing accomplishment. I forgot about the newspaper and how it is enjoyable to read when you are eating meals alone.  You spread it all over the table and p...

 A poor man is sitting on the side of the road in medieval England when a fellow in a funny green hat walks up to him. "My name is Robin Hood," he exclaims, "I steal from the rich and give to the poor!" as he tosses a sack of gold to the poor man. The man takes the bag and says, "Thank you so much!  Finally, my dream has come true!  I'm rich!" Robin Hood turns to him and sticks his sword in the man, pulls it out, sheaths it and says, "My name is Robin Hood.  I steal from the rich and give to the poor," He then takes the bag of gold and continues down the road.  <<<<<<<<< I had to break up with my girlfriend.  Turns out she was a Communist.  There were so many red flags. <<<<<<<<< A French man with a frog on his head walks into a bar.  The bartender looks quizzically at him and says, "Where'd you get that?"   The frog replies, "France - there's lots of them there....

There are Forensic Files episodes on Netflix.  I think they are from the 90s.  The voice over is spectacular and the interviews are highly entertaining.  Here's a script I am working on for them: Voiceover with photos as each item is said:  But what could a bag of onions, a handleless broom, and 6 locks without keys have to do with Shayna's disappearance that cold December night?  Janice would soon find out. Police:  We reached the scene and observed no sign of forced entry at the front door of Crafter's Market. That's a store. That sells crafts. Voiceover: The police investigated the scene and found a mysterious set of fingerprints on the wall next to Shayna, the victim. Police: We saw the victim and a mysterious set of fingerprints.  Immediately we radio'd the dispatcher and Captain to cordon off the vicinity and search for a suspect. Voiceover: Even more mysterious, the victim had a sign taped to her shirt with the same Shakespearean ...

Vacation is strange right now. I went on vacation and stayed at a hotel - With no room cleaning except right before and after our stay. Getting breakfast at the hotel - By going to the lobby and receiving a brown paper bag filled with yogurt, a bagel, hardboiled eggs and a muffin I went to restaurants - To order take out and eat in the hotel or in the car. I would go out to the grocery store to get lunch for a road trip - Wearing a mask and staying away from other people.

Each day seems the same.  Time passes quickly and there is little distinction from one day to another.  I think especially with no activities or vacations or meetings or school or real appointments to mark time, each day feel like a repeat of yesterday. The other day, I woke up and I didn't hear birds which was odd.  I didn't know what time it was.  We had birds in a nest until a couple weeks ago,  After the 5 eggs hatched, we heard the birds every morning and throughout the day as they cried out for food.  I'm not sure how, but they all grew in that nest and after what seemed like a very short time (but was probably several weeks), they each left the nest one by one.  Time passed for the birds and they moved on.  The other thing happening is that for the very few things I am supposed to be doing, it is very hard to get anything done.  There are several items looming - they are personal items - but they loom large.  Yet, the day p...

I couldn't think about much to say about the coronavirus, but maybe that says something.  My mother appears to think this is some important, monumental change that is shaking the foundation on which my life is built.  But it isn't.  Maybe it is for her, or other people, but not for me.  Maybe I'm just a kid who doesn't understand what's happening, and why it's important.  That could be partly true.  I'm not a toddler, and can comprehend most things around me, but I haven't been around for that long in comparison to others.  Maybe I can't understand that this is a crazy change that should  shake the foundation on which my life is built.  But is that such a bad thing? I have a theory, that since as kids, we are shaken up so much, we can roll with things as they come up more than others who who have settled down into a solid routine, which is part of a never-changing life plan.  Personally, I have no idea what's going on ever.  Basic...

This quarantine has helped me realize that I actually enjoyed school to an extent. At school I just can go through my day half asleep and follow along because my brain is being directly told what to do. For school at home, I have to actually figure out myself what I have to do and do it without being told.

Being on the phone and chats with our ISP provides me all the stress and contemplation experienced in a toxic high school relationship. I wonder: Why you ask me questions I can't answer, then hang up on me Why I'm always calling you Why you say one thing, but mean another Why I pay for everything Why you don't work Why connecting with my family has to be an issue Why I am I always waiting for you Why your first solution is restarting - we've been down that road so many times already If there is not something better out there for me

All we do is sit on the floor. The person who cleans is ignoring us more now that they are home all the time. The floor gets more populated with us and we're not six feet apart.

On Mother's Day, the mother prepared some food to eat.  Her family protested as they licked their lips and said, "you shouldn't have gone to all the trouble."  She said "No trouble, I just pulled a couple of things from the freezer."  Then she looked at them, started eating some pie, and said "what will you be having for dinner?"